Regaining My Footing

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For the past few weeks, I’ve felt as if I were engaged in a battle against myself. Deadlines at work, at home. A trip which I probably shouldn’t have taken, money I could have used better elsewhere. Stress on the job for a project that is finally, finally coming to an end. Sickness…Rachel and I have both been ill for almost a month. I even dropped out of church due to exhaustion and a fear of infecting more folks.

Last night I took a break in a job I was close to finishing, to get a drink and watch Leno’s monologue. Just that…10 minutes. Leno comes on here at 10:30. I got my water and my wrap and curled up in the recliner.

Never saw the end of the monologue. Two or three jokes in, I was gone. I don’t remember drifting off or even being all that sleepy. It’s almost as if I passed out. Obviously, my body was trying to give me a message. I woke up at 3:30am with a headache, puffy legs, and the feeling that I’d been thumped on the back. I crawled into bed. Got up at 7 to take care of Rach and have breakfast. Back to bed. Finally got up around 10 or so, feeling, for the first time in weeks, truly relaxed and rested. Even most of the stress, the feeling that I have to “get it done now” was missing.

After a call to my mom, I finished that job and emailed it off. Since then I’ve done laundry, made bread and soup, cleaned the fridge and the kitchen. But it’s all been very lazily done…no rush, just did whatever struck me. Most of all, I took one of my “spa breaks,” when I got in a hot shower and did all the girly stuff that involves lotions and scrubs and a razor. I’ve returned to the casual pace I usually keep on weekends. Even time seemed to slow down.

It’s been wonderful. And I feel ready to tackle some stuff I’ve put off for weeks.

Hey, just because I’m rested doesn’t mean I play to lay around the house with a box of Chocolat.

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